A Meme

Shmelessly, as always stole this one from Much More Than A Mom, because I'm just that way.


1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
The Grinch who stole Xmas. What a dick. Am I right, or what?

2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?
The Rolling Stones. Hey, Get A Clue. It's OVER. Mick, put a shirt on!

3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
Barney. 'nuf said.

4. What is your favorite cheese?
LOL. Land O'Lakes

5. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make?
Ice cream sandwich

6. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?
Queen Latifah

7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick?
Melissa Etheridge. Yes, yes. I know she's gay. Hello? MY fantasy.

8. Now that you’ve slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy crap, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it?
Definitely either donate it to the Church, or, buy imported beer and higher grade porn. (shouldn't really bank on the Church one)

9. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
WDW.

10. Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do?
Souveniers

11. A demon rises out of Hell and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is…?
Vodka Sours.

12. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there? 1981, become good friends with Bill Gates.

13. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?
No anger.

14. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what’s the premise?
'Fuddles'. A goofy, big dog who always comes to the rescue.

15. What is your favorite curse word?
Not so much a word, as a phrase. Fuckin' idiot. As in, "Do you know you're talking out loud? Are you really that much of a fuckin' idiot?"

16. One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?
I'm sorry but, this one was just dumb.

17. Your house is on fire! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the item?
My Brother-in-law.

18. The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour?
Get lost.

19. You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What’s it gonna be?
Flying.

20. You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
A summer afternoon when I was seventeen when I looked around and I thought everything in my life was perfect.

21. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
Clothes from the 1970's, except for desert boots. A decade of casual sex and fashion that guaranteed you would never get laid.

22. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool stuff… you can move to anywhere else in the world! Bitchin’! What country are you going to live in now?
Canada, eh.

23. This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. You have been eternally banned from every single bar in the world except for ONE. Which one is it gonna be?
Harry's Cafe in Chicago.

24. Hopefully you didn’t mention this in the super-powers question…. If you did, then we’ll just expand on that. Check it out… Suddenly, you have gained the ability to FLOAT!!! Whose house are you going to float to first, and be like “Dude, check it out… I can FLOAT!”?
Dave Letterman's house. I would be a guaranteed winner of the 'Will It Float' segment.

25. The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life?
Walt Disney

26. The Gates of Hell have opened, and Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person, etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?
I wouldn't be able to handle picking someone to have give up heaven to come back here

27. What’s your theme song?
Jump

Connecticut Yankee Party of 29, Please. Right This Way...

Hope you had a good Thanksgiving, or as I like to call it, Big Pants Day.

T-Day is a glorius thing for so many reasons that I've listed before.

1. No pressure of gifts.
2. It is a NATIONAL FOOD HOLIDAY.
3. (Most) Folks get Friday off from work/school by virtue of the FACT that Thanksgiving is ALWAYS on a Thursday.
4. No religion involved. Everyone celebrates.
5. Leftovers.

I have hosted Thanksgiving dinner in my humble abode(s) every year since the '80's (because I LOVE leftovers) and have each year had a modest group of family members/guests that numbered from about 8-12 people generally. I have always harbored a dream of having all the family members gathered at my house for Thanksgiving and this year it came true. I fufilled my dream and 29 family members feasted in my quaint colonial home on 2 turkeys, a Carando ham, including a gut-busting amount of trimmings (there is only one way to have stuffing...and it is from the bird) and many homemade (rude and evil, "calories are our friends!") desserts.

I was going to detail some logistical problems that secured my position on why I'm never going to do this again, but this isn't the time. Everyone told me they had a good time and I believe them. An impetuous Australian Shiraz kept my blues away and there were so many great leftovers. A very serious amount. All good. No fruitcakes, if you know what I'm saying.

Oh, I almost forgot the best reason:

6. Friday is TV/Couch/Grazing Day.

Excuse me, I have to loosen my sweatpants...again.

In The Land That Our Grandchildren Knew

Kind of an ambiguous title for this post because as much as I want to talk about Thanksgiving, the best, and my favorite holiday, I don't know how much will get to it within this post.
Lots of personal tragedies in my life just waiting for me to blurt out in whiney crybaby fashion, and I guess a blog is really good for that purpose, but somehow it just doesn't really say 'me'.
Right now at this moment I want to be heading to Anna Liffey's (a bar with Guinness on tap) and pretending to fit in with the crowd that is way younger than me. All under the guise of me thinking it would be fun and them not thinking, "Whoa, the guy's like twice our age".
It's sort of a Love/Hate relationship with bars. I love them because they have well, y'know...alcohol. And a festive atmosphere. I hate them because the alcohol is so fucking expensive! Still, there is that festive atmosphere.
The money part prevents me from associating with my clutch of ne'er do wells, as often as I would like. Money, or lack of therein, prevents alot of things.
I miss being younger, too. Then again, who doesn't. I'm not really that bad off in the age department, but just for me personally there are just alot of things I miss. One would be school time. Not school itself, but the lifestyle. It always turns out to be an, if-I-knew-then-what-I-know-now, crying in your beer, life story, but that isn't where I'm going. Not dwelling. Just mentioning. Moving on.
Photographs are big helpers for isolating a time. Happy memories of vacations standing in line waiting to get on a ride in DisneyWorld just before a downpour. A sister when she was little looking impish, before growing up and facing countless operations for medical conditions that were dormant. Friends who have come and gone. Favored relatives who have left me behind (That's you cousin Mark, for not taking care of your diabetes).

For my life
Still ahead
Pity Me.

Don't Know Where to Begin

It's been so long and a lot has happened. I am sure with extreme effort I could put a funny spin on it, and I may give that the college try, but then again...
Since the last time I posted I've only occasionally making comments guerrilla-style on other peoples blogs without giving them a chance to poke fun at me because i hadn't posted anything in a long time. Rude of me, to be sure.
I truly respect the people who post all the time

ah, y'know what? Fuck this, I'm goin' to bed. Maybe more tomorrow.